Terrorized by a rat, or opposum, or something.
Okay, so every fucking night since I moved here, some creature has been crawling through my walls. It's only late at night, when there's no longer movement in the house, and the lights are all off, and it always crawls right up the wall beside my bed. I don't know what the fuck it is! I don't know how it got in there!
I want it dead so bad!
Seriously. This little bastard. It wakes me up like seven or eight times in the night. One time I picked up a 20lb weight and was considering hurling it at the noise in the wall. I decided against it, because it could be a raccoon, and those bastards are eerily clever, and instead of killing it I might just really, really piss it off, and incur its rabies-fuelled bloodlust, but yeah.
Ugh. I'm wearing headphones when I go to sleep until I figure out a way to kill that thing.
It can crawl through my walls, but it cannot crawl through... my freedom.
I want it dead so bad!
Seriously. This little bastard. It wakes me up like seven or eight times in the night. One time I picked up a 20lb weight and was considering hurling it at the noise in the wall. I decided against it, because it could be a raccoon, and those bastards are eerily clever, and instead of killing it I might just really, really piss it off, and incur its rabies-fuelled bloodlust, but yeah.
Ugh. I'm wearing headphones when I go to sleep until I figure out a way to kill that thing.
It can crawl through my walls, but it cannot crawl through... my freedom.
posted by ☭CRUSH you. at 2:15 AM
19 Comments:
Do you live in a dorm? Can't you tell a landlord or something?
What if it's a baby?
I didn't know you slept. That seems so...normal...for someone like you.
Yeah, they can be a pain in the ass hole. A friend of mine back in the day had squirrels that lived in his ceiling. Drove him nuts. Get them out before it's too late. Because those little fucks might chew thru your power lines, and you'll be out of power. Plus, if they do it right they can electrocute themselves, and that might start a fire in your place and then you'd burn to death in your sleep. And I don't think that's the kind of rest you need.
Dorm? No wayyy.
If it's a baby... oh god, it makes this much noise and it's only a baby?!
Everyone sleeps sometimes. Even me. Although, I do sleep less than most people consider healthy, even without rat-bastards keeping me up.
Well, there's that one african guy who never sleeps, but he's insane and has a degraded sleep center or something weird.
Beefy - I might burn, but they will too. So we shall burn together. I'll be like a captain, dying with his ship, if it wasn't really his ship and was his house instead, and he wasn't really a captain just some guy.
Dude... watch out.
Oh yeah.
So, my link is gone. Way not cool.
So you'll only comment if your link's gone?
You never comment anymore. At all. Even when I write really cool posts. Which is lame. Not even after I commented on your blog. Soooo yes I removed your link, and replaced it with a link to Hustler, because nobody links to Hustler on blogger but I don't know why.
Speaking of links... "how do you know i dont look at you while you sleep?"
... ?
It's hard enough to sleep with the infamous Reed workload on my shoulders and Bawls coursing through my veins... now it may be utterly impossible. So thanks. Bastard.
Anytime, good buddy!
And you SO don't remember what that's from, either. Or the rest of it. "how do you know i dont look at you while you sleep?
i don't.
but how do you know?"
Okay, yeah, I suck at commenting. But I sooo reply back everytime you comment on my blog!
And yeah, I will comment more now, sorry. Maybe I'll earn my link again :)
Don't count on it. I still haven't gotten a link, and I'm always posting, even after his constant attempts to keep me away.
By the way crush you, the cluster bombs were duds.
What's up with the baby in the wall? Have you got it yet?
Do you live in a house like the one on Paper Street in Fight Club? Is that how you live, you amoralist?
I'll sleep when I'm dead, that's what I say.
Beefy - Dude, seriously.
Socio - Yess apparently some of us choose not to click the funny words on the right... which, considering where some of them lead is probably a good idea, but still.
Fritz - Yeah, I took an icepick to the bastard, fuck the wall, I was thinking of having it removed anyways, to make a... uh... door... outside... on the second story... um, I mean, a balcony. Yeah. It turned out to be a small family of opossums, harmless opossums, and also a bunch of tiny bones from whatever they had been dragging in there and eating.
I only wish my finding had shed some light on those recent baby dissappearances in the area...
Did you kiss the little marsupials and make them cry?
I bet you did, you love those little hairless tails.
Yeah, I checked them out one day and didn't see it. Oh well. OOPS. That still doesn't change the fact that the cluster bomb didn't work.
And I found babies in the wall, but I forgot that I put them there. I was looking for space for more babies and stumbled across some that I put in there years ago. I really should plan that stuff out better.
So what happened with the horse in your wall?
Beefy - ? I killed the big ones with an icepick and spent like an hour trying to get the little ones out from between my boot-treads.
Fritz - Haha. I was dating two chicks, getting disinfected by a hospital, dealing with copious amounts of homework and workingg. But, luck you guys! I dumped 'em both, am at an impass as various vaccinnations and fun chemicals slur through my blood, and am mostly done with some of my homework, so I'll probably post or something similar.
Cool, whatever.
How am I supposed to comment if you NEVER update??
Post a Comment
<< Home