omg omg omg I think I'm gonna wet my jeans I'm so excited!

"BRITAIN

Court allows creation of embryos for cures

British couples may create embryos through in vitro fertilization to help cure sick siblings, Britain's highest appeal court ruled Thursday, rejecting a challenge from an anti-abortion group. The Law Lords backed a 2003 Court of Appeal ruling that some couples undergoing the fertility treatment could have their embryos screened to find tissue matches for seriously ill children.

Opponents fear that the procedure could lead to the creation of babies for spare parts. "

And you assholes said my idea of a baby sandwich was unrealistic and sick. Who's the jackass now, huh?

Swiss engineers completed drilling Thursday for the 21-mile Loetschberg tunnel -- the world's longest. The cavernous shaft, begun 11 years ago, burrows under the Swiss Alps and into Germany. It is set to open to trains in 2007.

...all I gotta say is, that's a little unusual. In the sense that the cavernous shaft could also be viewed as a subconscious representation of a Swiss woman's vagina.

DO NOT RESUSCITATE

My funny has temporarily fled my skinny, cancerous little arian self, much as a reptile may crawl forth from the hole-home it has carved within the broadside of a deer carcass in order to find vegetables to supplement its diet and mice to rape to soothe the truly massive randy british horniness which shakes its tiny lizard body with a diabetic's regularity.
a.k.a., go read some other freak's journal you excruciatingly stimulating internet-capable anglo-saxons!

P.S. I say anglo-saxons because you are only allowed to read this journal if you are a member of one of the Germanic peoples who invaded England in the 5th century, A.D. And if you aren't, then GO TO HELL YOU GODDAMNED ENGLISH WHORE.

Yeah that's right. I mean you.

I only post things like this because I hate you.

Why my neighbor does not have a rock through his window or slimy camel penis head.

So I'm going through the positions of the kama sutra with my seven young, ravishing nubian wives (an experience you americans can only dream of with your foolish monogamatic marriages) when suddenly I have this strikingly abundant thought: If one were to hurl a medium sized stone from the top of my wondrous shanty across the sandy plains of my neighbor (the neighbor I have put a Jihad on- no not that neighbor, the other one) would such a stone not hit the ground before hitting that slimy camel penis of a man's house? Or might it not continue on its path, if hurled with appropriate force, to quite possibly smash the infidel's window? I attempted to consult wives 2 and 5 on the subject, as they are the most sharp of the bunch, but sadly, once again I had pleasured them beyond the ability to form coherent sentences. No, these were not random american tourist girls I had kidnapped off the street and the reason they were unable to speak was that I couldn't remove their gags or they might start screaming again, and when they start screaming the only choice is to stab them over and over and over in the throat and ankles then rig their bodies with explosives and send them off in a taxi towards Palestinia. Anyways, I was consumed with curiousity at that point, and so ordered them to pleasure each other and sell videos of it on-line for immense profit while I set out to determine what exactly a rock might do in the previously mentioned situation.
Sadly I was to be thwarted before the rock could even be hurled.
While in theory my idea was sound, I had neglected to recall that the roof of the shanty must be reached with a stone in hand. The rock I had procured from the site of a recent stoning (it was the killing rock, I have found the rock which ended an infidel's life, praise be to Allah!), but there was no conceivable way to reach the top of my shanty! My horrible curiousity would have ended there but for my wondrous ingenuity.
"**How," I had howled to the night, "shall I ever reach this shanty's tall height?!" Just then a man approached. He claimed to be of the name Szhagjin dil Zabdihad, and said he was a constructor of ladders and hydraulic platforms, and that he had an excess of both products due to the mounting number of infidels God had continually sent his way. As he spoke, I noticed suddenly that he had thought God and not the Almighty Jesus Christ had flooded his homeland with infidels! I was forced to bludgeon him to death with my medium sized rock on the spot.
His body, smashed and broken, lay before me, and suddenly bits and pieces of the conversation began fitting together. "constructor of ladders and hydraulic platforms" "excess of both products" "Why are you bludgeoning me to death with that rock oh Allah why is this happening"... I could make steps to the top of the shanty using the bodies of infidels! Post-haste I made my way about the nearby area, finding and murdering no less than seventeen people who seemed mildly conspicuous, then one-by-one dragging the bodies to the edge of my shanty. But at that time I was very tired and very bloody so I stopped the bloodshed and went inside to make love to my many captive tourists. And by that I mean wives.




**Translated from Arabanese for your viewing pleasure, but you're probably a fucking heathenous infidel anyways, so fuck you good sir.

Babies: Just A Choking Hazard for Dingos, or Something More?

I scrape by on a razor's edge of bare tolerance for the basic human shape. What the fuck makes random assholes whom I have previously updated on the fact that their buck-toothed slackjawed rash and sore infested face forces me to reminisque back to the days I hunted inbred moles in my backyard with a Colt that I would ever desire to view their bile-dripping offspring?
Humans are twisted, shambling messes of creatures whose crudely stretched features could only be forged by a sadist with a smidgeon too much time on its hands. Babies are disformed, hairless, lumpy little e-z-break versions of humans, who severely lack any semblance of intelligence, dignity or grace. Many of you mindless fucking idiots love the little shreiking piss and shit machines because deep inside of your misfiring neurons and decaying brain waves, the idea that those worthless peices of crap contain the potential to perform some fantastic acts or give amazing head when they get older really appeals to you. Well guess what? Take a look around, jackass, because who you see surrounding you now is what that tiny fuck is liable to turn into. Not a hot chick who gives fantastic head; rather, if she is indeed hot, the bitch will hate you for being old and creepy. Not a lawyer who fucks vast amounts of people over and returns home to support you, think more along the lines of that balding man with the desparate eyes in the 7-11 who hasn't spoken to his parents since he was fifteen. Those little peices of crap are a dime a dozen, and they aren't hard to make(if you argue, fuck you. And by what exponent is our population rising?). Fuck it. I forgot why I was talking. Anyways, They are a choking hazard for dingos, and that's pretty much it. Next time someone wants you to touch their slimy vomitspawn, or fuck, you want someone to see your beauteous little pile of shit, just Remember, Think of the goddamned Dingos: Because dingo people are people too.

Short And To The Pointless

As we mill about our arbitrarily assigned lives, occasionally in the twisted, bloody montage of humanity, a singular fragment, a lone fraction, a pitiful sole benefactor of this world's most despicable race will step foreward to ask a simple question: "What the Fuck."
During a rather pointless stroll along the collegiate promenade this day, One Such insipidly cynical lone individual who Currently attended the aforementioned College in Question was accosted by a rather purposeful and Seemingly pleasureful feminine member of the opposite sex. Being as This Lone Individual was as antisocial as all the whores of Babylon after a particularly foul bout of Babylonian Syphilis and He had Neglected to pack a loaded firearm as his flippant self had fled from his Rat Hole of a home that Very Morning, he could not Simply shoot the Miss who had so rudely spoken to Him, and so Asked Her why the Fuck she was Talking to him. The response of Yon Harpy was Simply that she Could Not recall at what time and what form the Assignment of Alchemical Homework was To have been assigned and to be due at. Not Wishing to withdraw From His Knapsack what indubitably would take Many Minutes to procure, namely said work, He Proclaimed whatfore He did not take A course of Alchemy, also that The Hell-Hag In question was Idiotic and Oblivious to her own Damned surroundings. Of Course, due to the Lone Individual's Prior Commentaries Within that particular Class regarding that The three Most Popular MOvies having suxxored With Extremeness: LotR, Star Trek, and also Star Wars, He Was Already rather reviled by All The putrid Campus-onians, so This Ugly, grimy Slut of a girl Began bitching for about The Lies that the Lone individual constantly spat upon Her and her slathering colleagues in nothing short of an unending stream. "What The fuck" manifests itself at this point. Are sole benefactors of the Putrescent masses Truley Responsible to Care and cater for the Every minor quandary which befalls all of th0se sickening Thralls and Peons Which crawl upon a potentially virtuous Singular humanitarian Fragment's disturbingly Oversized Feet as he awkwardly Flops his way about His respective towns Swamps Castles Cities Plains and So-Called Shanties? MY counterply to this query Would be Fucking Hell NO asshole.
Thank you, fuck you, and I hope that whoever you are, you are raped repeatedly for days at a time by a pack of AIDS-crazed wolves who then suck on your eyes until you develop fucking blisters spread abreadth the innards of your skullbones.

Fuck you.